


Bitters On the Rocks

by fab_fan



Series: Drunk Words - Sober Thoughts [10]
Category: Motherland: Fort Salem (TV)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Evil Author Day, F/F, Family, Glory Needs to Send More Craft Beer, Light Angst, Oh My God, Or Moonshine, Protective Parents, Sorry Not Sorry, Teenagers, The Author Regrets Nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:08:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25040650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fab_fan/pseuds/fab_fan
Summary: “Oh goddess, she’s going to propose.” Raelle murmured.“I’ll keep her away from the grassy fields.” Scylla whispered back.“At least she didn’t break into the house this time.”“She could still break a window with those rock throwing skills.”“Moonshine is still in the cabinet, right? How strong are these beers?”“Mom. Momma.” Henley pulled her shoulders back and puffed her chest out. She dug her hand in her jacket’s inside pocket and plucked out a medallion, tossing the chain over her head dramatically and letting the pendant rest against her chest proudly, “I enlisted in Fort Salem’s upcoming first year cadet class. I took the oath.”
Relationships: Raelle Collar/Scylla Ramshorn
Series: Drunk Words - Sober Thoughts [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1755784
Comments: 48
Kudos: 355





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Occurs after First Death.

Henley skipped through the entryway, kicking the door shut behind her with one sneaker clad foot as she tossed her keys into the ceramic bowl nestled near the door with a flourish. Dropping her bag next to the small table, she hopped around on one foot, slipping out of one shoe and then the other. With practiced ease, she deposited her shoes next to a pair of well worn brown leather boots and smudged black oxfords she remembered her momma grumbling about having to wear for a consult. 

“Mom! Momma! I’m back!” she called out, patting her chest, imagining the papers folded inside her inner jacket pocket around a shiny new necklace, two things she couldn’t wait to share.

Hearing voices, the teen ambled toward the living room. Giddy to share her news, she paused in the doorway, taking in the scene before her with a giant smile. Scylla was seated at one end of the couch, glasses on as she balanced a book in one hand and a pen in the other, notebook splayed open on the arm with thoughts jotted down in small crisp penmanship. Raelle was tucked into her side, absently playing with the fingers draped over her shoulder as she squinted at a file. Two bottles of the local craft beer Aunt Glory had sent them a few weeks prior sat on the coffee table, condensation forming along the brown glass and staining the label.

“I think they’d take her back.” Raelle gave a tiny shrug.

Scylla hummed, turning the page, “Doesn’t work that way, Rae.”

“Thought there was a return policy. We can trade one kid for another if we got tired of her.” Raelle brought the paper closer to her face. Her voice dropped to a whisper, “What is this?”

“You really need to go get your eyes checked. Dr. Hendricks is good.” Scylla sighed.

“My eyes are fine.”

“You couldn’t read the traffic signs the other day.”

“It was dark, and I was blinded by your beauty.” 

Scylla tangled their fingers together and gave a light squeeze, “I’ll make an appointment for next week.”

“So bossy. You know, I’m a fixer.” Raelle exhaled, “Can we get a new kid, then? I’m thinking someone less sassy.”

“You always said you wanted a daughter like me.”

“Yeah, but you’re sassy after...” Raelle blinked.

Scylla unlinked their hands and patted her chest, “After what?”

Raelle tilted her head, locking eyes on Henley, “How shiny?”

Henley flushed.

“Damn it.” Raelle shook her head, “That’s it. New kid.”

“Hush,” Scylla smirked, “As if you weren’t doing the same exact thing when you were Hen’s age.”

“I was a perfect gentlewoman, thank you very much.” 

“Sure you were, babe.” Scylla bent down, mouth brushing against Raelle’s ear, “How did we get together, again?”

A smug smile flickered, “Not sure I remember. Might need to jog my memory, Scyl.”

“Ok,” Henley walked into the room, hands raised, “The adult has entered the room, kiddos.”

“Your daughter is no fun.” Raelle grumbled playfully.

Scylla quirked an eyebrow. “ _My daughter_?”

“Mom, Momma.” Henley strode to the center of the room. She planted her feet firmly on the floor, back going ramrod straight. As two sets of blue eyes focused on her, she couldn’t help but feel her giddiness turn into a bit of anxiousness. Her hands plunged into the front pockets of her jeans, but they only lasted a moment there before jumping out. Her palms immediately came together, rubbing nervously.

“Henley, what’s wrong?” Scylla asked, concern furrowing her brows. She set her book down and pushed her glasses up to rest on top of her head.

Raelle lifted herself up, sitting up straight as she studied the younger witch, instinctively sweeping her eyes up and down, checking for any signs of injury, “Hen?”

Henley took a deep breath, unconsciously rocking back and forth on her feet, “Ok, I have something really important to say, and it’s not bad, I swear, but it’s important and I’m really excited.”

Scylla and Raelle shared a quick look before fully facing her.

“Go ahead, honey.” Scylla encouraged, offering a comforting smile. 

Raelle looped an arm around the back of the sofa, “What’s the news?” She narrowed her eyes teasingly, “You’re not pregnant are you? That’s it, Scyl, we’re trading in. I’m thinking a nice ten year old. Maybe someone will finally listen to me about lacrosse.”

“I’m not pregnant.” Henley rolled her eyes. “Alison’s not that good.”

“Shut up, Rae.” Scylla patted her stomach. “Let her talk.”

Henley took a fortifying breath, “Well, Alison sort of plays into this, though.”

“Oh goddess, she’s going to propose.” Raelle murmured.

“I’ll keep her away from the grassy fields.” Scylla whispered back.

“At least she didn’t break into the house this time.”

“She could still break a window with those rock throwing skills.”

“Moonshine is still in the cabinet, right? How strong are these beers?”

“Mom. Momma.” Henley pulled her shoulders back and puffed her chest out. She dug her hand in her jacket’s inside pocket and plucked out a medallion, tossing the chain over her head dramatically and letting the pendant rest against her chest proudly, “I enlisted in Fort Salem’s upcoming first year cadet class. I took the oath.”

The temperature in the room plummeted.

A static silent chill enveloped the home.

Time froze.

Henley watched as her parents’ faces fell. Scylla’s went blank, eyes unblinking, glazed over with something Henley had never seen before. Raelle tensed, body as stiff as a statue. Neither moved. It was as if they weren’t even breathing.

They weren’t.

Slowly, her excited nerves turned to fear, “Mom? Momma?”

The couple just stared. 

The silence unsettling, Henley fidgeted harder, “I know we talked about me going to University this fall, but I really think this is the right move for me. I mean, you both served. Aunt Abi and Aunt Tally...Aunt Anacostia...everyone. It’s sort of like my birthright, right? Our family serves in the Army.”

Scylla abruptly stood up and walked out.

“Mom?” Henley frowned at her mother’s retreating back. “What?” She licked her lips, turning back to Raelle, “Momma?”

Raelle looked like she had been punched in the gut and then smacked in the face by a sledgehammer. She looked sick.

She looked shattered.

“Momma?” Henley chewed her bottom lip, deflating, “What’s...why’d Mom leave? I thought...I thought you’d be proud. Happy. Momma?”

Raelle blinked as if coming out of a daze. Her jaw worked, lost eyes suddenly wet, “Did someone make you do this? A-Abigail or…”

“No.” Henley shook her head. “You two were the first I told. I...I thought this was what we did. I know you two never talk about your time serving, always said there were other options, but I thought that was just because you didn’t want to pressure me to serve. But, I talked with Alison about it. A lot. And, I really want to be with her.”

“You’re joining to be with your girlfriend?” Scylla’s voice, incredulous and brimming with anger, called out. 

Henley spun around to see her mom. She was nearly vibrating, face fighting to remain composed. The tick of a brow and flicker of a jaw showed she was losing the battle quickly.

“I’ve talked with Alison about this. A lot. She’s told me all about Fort Salem. What training is like. I think I’d be good at it. I could learn a lot. Become stronger. They could teach me a lot, and not just what’s in textbooks. I could do something interesting...exciting. Help people.”

“Fuck, Henley.” Raelle breathed out.

“I...I don’t understand.” Henley looked back and forth between the two. “Why are you so upset? What’s wrong?”

“Raelle,” Scylla ground out, on the verge of snapping in a way Henley couldn’t understand, couldn’t quite grasp, “our room.”

Raelle slowly climbed to her feet, appearing like she had gotten into a fight and lost.

Maybe she had.

“Mom,” Henley took a step.

Scylla raised a shaky hand, “Your momma and I need to talk. Right now.”

“Stay here, Henley.” Raelle ordered.

“But,”

“Stay. Here.” Raelle barked.

Henley watched them go, Raelle a few paces behind the brunette. She listened as they trudged up the steps, floor creaking when they reached the landing and crossed to their bedroom.

Henley bit her lip, hands shaking as she pressed them together. The weight of the medal suddenly felt like a boulder around her neck. She grasped it in her fist, the cool metal doing nothing to calm her racing heart. 

She had never seen her parents like that. Sure, sometimes they got angry with her. Frustrated. Upset. But never...cold. Never silent. Not like that. They never walked away from her. 

Never left her.

She flinched as raised voices punctured the quiet. 

She gulped.

She couldn’t remember them ever yelling that loudly. 

Loud enough she could almost make out their words this far away.

Body trembling, she carefully crept toward the stairs. Holding her breath, she tiptoed up, needing to know what was happening.

What they were saying.

Sneaking down the hallway, not unlike the many times she crept out to look at the stars late at night or go down to make breakfast before her moms woke up as a special treat on the weekend, Henley grimaced as the voices took form.

“You promised, Raelle!” Scylla cried out. “You promised me.”

“What do you want me to do?” Raelle shot back, “I didn’t know. She didn’t tell me.”

“You said this wouldn’t happen. If we had a child, this wouldn’t happen.”

“I know!”

“Joining because of her girlfriend? Giving up everything for a girl?”

“Yeah, Scyl, doesn’t sound familiar at all. Not like you ever gave up everything for a girlfriend.”

“Oh, don’t even, Raelle. That was different. Don’t act like you aren’t happy about this.”

Henley reached the edge of the doorway. She crouched down, knees pulled to her chest as she listened. 

“Happy? Are you serious?” Raelle’s voice cracked, “You think I wanted this?”

“You stayed long after I wanted you to leave. You wanted to be a soldier, had to be one, even after I begged you not to.”

“You know why I stayed.” Raelle bit out, “You know exactly why I did that, and you know exactly why I left.”

“Are you saying you didn’t want to leave, now?”

“No!” Raelle’s arms swung with frustration, “I retired because I wanted to be with my family. I wanted you. I wanted her. I wanted us.”

“She said she’s doing this because of us. Because _we served_.”

Raelle helplessly threw her hands up, “I never told her to. You know that, Scyl. _You know I didn’t want this._ ” She sniffed, “I thought..” she trailed off, mouth clamping shut as a tear tracked down her cheek, following the line of her scar.

“Everything I ever did was to keep you safe. Both of you.” Scylla’s voice broke, “I did everything so she wouldn’t have to go there.”

The room turned silent.

One heartbeat.

Two.

“Rae,” Scylla’s voice was little more than a sob, “I am not losing her. I am not losing my daughter.” 

“It’s not like it was before.” Raelle reasoned. “She...she’ll be ok.” There was no confidence in her words.

“Like you were?” Scylla sneered, voice tattered, “Like how you were supposed to go to War College when you graduated Basic?” 

Henley’s eyebrows knitted together. Her momma had gone to War College. With Aunt Abigail and Aunt Tally.

“Scyl,”

“I went to your funeral, Raelle.” Scylla’s voice was quiet but deathly somber, “I stood there and watched them talk about you in front of an empty casket. I had to hear about you dying. I had to listen as Anacostia told me you were never coming back. Do not tell me she’ll be ok. You were supposed to graduate and go to War College, but you were sent out that same day to be left for dead.” Her words dropped to a shattered whisper, “She’s so much like you, Raelle.”

Henley slammed a hand to her mouth to muffle the gasp.

Dead?

Her momma died? 

No.

It couldn’t be.

They would have told her.

Someone would have told her.

How could her momma be dead? She was right there. She had ruffled Henley’s hair that morning before Henley left to go complete the oath. She had watched her parents kiss each other good morning over tea and coffee. She was standing right there!

Henley’s mind raced, her subconscious desperate for something to hold on to, to make sense. 

Her momma graduated and went to War College. She served in the Camarilla War. Her and her mom both fought. After, she served at Fort Salem, leading the re-establishment of the Fixer Units before retiring. Her mom and momma both worked civilian jobs. Her mom taught. Her momma helped a local clinic as a consultant. 

They had her.

They were a family.

That’s what happened.

Wasn’t it?

“I accepted you staying. I’m not accepting them taking my child. I don’t care what you say.”

“She chose this, Scyl.”

“She doesn’t know what she chose!” Footsteps pounded against the floor, “I have to stare at that scar on your chest every single day and remind myself you’re still here. That they didn’t take you like they took my parents.” Her voice croaked, “Can you promise me they won’t take her, too? That our daughter will never know what we went through? The pain? Can you? Or will you make that promise and break it?”

Henley couldn’t help it. She had to see them. Ducking her head around the corner, her hand fell from her mouth and smacked against the floor.

Her parents were face to face, Scylla’s hand clutching Raelle’s shirt right above her heart. Above the scar Henley always thought was kind of cool and had been told Raelle had gotten while in the Army but never knew specifically how. Assumed it was from fixing someone or a crazy prank gone wrong. 

They both had tears streaming down their faces.

Though her mom sounded angry, she looked...terrified.

Broken blue eyes snapped to her as her hand hit the floor. 

Raelle’s eyes burned, and Henley froze at the emotions churning in the blue orbs. “I told you to stay downstairs. You want to be in the Army? You better fucking get used to obeying orders.” Raelle growled.

Henley’s eyes widened, “Momma?”

“Downstairs, Henley Ramshorn-Collar, or I swear to the goddess you will not like what happens.”

Henley scrambled to her feet, tripping down the stairs as her throat burned and a knot formed in her belly.

Her momma had never spoken to her like that. Ever.

Her parents had never cried like that before.

Bursting out of her house, shoeless and medallion smacking against her chest, she sprinted to the car parked in front of the garage. Jamming her hand into the handle, she tugged it open and flopped inside.

She reached for the ignition, ready to run, ready to get away from this.

Her empty hand hovered near the steering wheel.

Damn it.

She’d forgotten the keys in the house.

Breathing heavily, mind whirling, confused and distraught, she slapped at her pockets. Unsteady fingers scooped out her phone, and she blindly pressed buttons, not even knowing she was crying until she couldn’t see anything past the sheen of water clinging to her lashes and dripping down her cheeks. 

She clumsily held it to her ear, the soft ringing not doing anything to stem her building sobs.

“Hello, Henley.” Abigail Bellweather’s elegant voice answered politely, “How are you? Are you and your parents still coming up to visit later this month?”

The dam broke, “Aunt Abi,” she wept, chest aching.

“Henley?” her tone instantly turned worried, “Are you ok? Where are you? Where are your parents?”

“They...they…” she couldn’t think, couldn’t speak past the tears.

“Calm down.” Abigail ordered, “Breathe. It’s ok. Take a deep breath, Henley.”

Henley nodded, doing as she was told. 

After a few breaths, she felt her head clear slightly.

“Henley,” Abigail was firm, “Are you hurt?”

She shook her head.

“Words, Henley.”

“No.”

“Good. Are you safe?”

A nod.

“Words.”

“Yes.”

“Are your mom and momma ok?”

A sob.

“Henley, breathe. What happened. I can call for help, but you have to tell me what is wrong.”

“They hate me.”

A pause.

“Henley, that is impossible.”

“No, they do. Everything is wrong and so messed up. I messed up and now they’re fighting and yelling and I don’t know what’s happening and they were crying and mom won’t even look at me.”

“Henley,” Abigail interrupted forcefully. “Stop.”

Henley bit her lip to hold in the words waiting to burst out.

“Start over. Why are your parents fighting?”

“I wanted to make them proud. I thought they’d be happy.”

“What did you do?”

“I enlisted.”

The line went silent.

And stayed silent.

“Aunt Abi?”

“Shit.” Abigail sighed wearily.

“What?” Henley wiped at her nose, “Why...why is everyone acting like this? What’s wrong? They served, right? You are still in the Army. Aunt Tally...Aunt Glory...Aunt Anacostia...everyone I know has served except Grandpop.”

“Henley,” she exhaled, words pure exhaustion, “you need to talk to your parents about this.”

“What’s wrong?” her quivering voice rose, “They won’t tell me anything, and they told me to stay downstairs, but they’re crying and yelling!”

“Henley, talk to your mom and momma. Trust me, you need to all talk.”

“What aren’t you telling me?”

“It’s not my place, Henley. It never was. You have to hear it from them, ok? Go talk to your parents. If you need to, you can call me after. It’s ok. They love you. More than anything.”

Henley bowed her head sniffling, “Ok.”

“I’m here if you need me. We all are."

“Thanks, Aunt Abi.”

“You’re welcome.”

Henley quietly hung up the phone, hair covering her face as she clenched the small piece of plastic and metal in her fist. She rested her forehead on the steering wheel, her entire body hurting with the emotions swirling inside. 

She cried.

Cried for the way her parents looked at her, looked at each other.

Cried for the way the medallion that felt so right when she first put it on now felt like a curse.

Cried for how lost she felt. 

She never felt so alone. So confused. 

A knock on the window caused her head to fly back.

Raelle stood outside the door, face grim and eyes dark with unshed sadness, “Let’s sit.”

Henley frowned, not understanding, but got out of the car. The two slowly walked to the little step that led up to the door. Raelle sat down, patting the spot beside her. Henley plopped down, bringing the ends of her sleeves over her knuckles and huddling into a small ball, knees shoved into her chest. 

Raelle licked her lips, swallowing thickly before speaking, “I promised your mom you wouldn’t join the Army. Before you were born. Even after.”

“Why?”

A shrug, “Because neither of us have the best memories of the Army, especially your mom.”

“What happened? Why didn’t you tell me this before? Why did you keep this a secret?”

She fiddled with her ring, spinning the simple band around her finger on her left hand, “It’s a lot. We didn’t want to scare you or...have you look at us differently. We wanted to protect you. The very second we knew you were something we wanted, we could have, we both vowed to protect you, no matter what.”

“I don’t need protection!”

“Yeah, maybe.”

“I’m not a little kid, Momma! We’re a family! That’s what you always said. We are a family, and we don’t lie to each other.”

Her jaw ticked, “This is different.”

“Why? Why is this different?” Anger bubbled inside, replacing the tears.

“I died."

The rage instantly disappeared, “What?”

“I died.” Raelle rubbed at her chest, “Or, everyone thought I did. Me and your Aunt Abi. We were deployed, and I got stabbed.”

“Your scar.”

A nod, “Your Aunt tried to save me but...she’s a lousy fixer, and I was too far gone, anyway.” Her lips pursed, “I’m only here because your mom found me. Found us.”

Henley didn’t know what to say.

“Scylla...your mom...never liked the Army. She has her reasons. A lot of them. What they did to her parents. To her. To all of us.”

“But, you both served. Everyone in our family served.”

“It’s different. We didn’t have a choice. We were forced to. Conscripted.” a pause, “Your mom fought so you wouldn’t be forced to go through what we did. That you wouldn’t be forced to fight, especially if there was nothing worth fighting for. We both fought the Camarilla to protect our kind, to protect witches. So we, _you_ , could live and not be hunted down. But she...”

“Momma…”

“Here,” she shoved her hand in her pocket. A moment later she revealed an old bird’s foot with something blue in its claw.

“What is it?” Henley carefully took it, inspecting it closely. 

“Browerbird foot. They like blue things. Anything blue.” Raelle nodded at it, “It’s a combat charm. Passed down from one Collar to the next. You wear it to keep you safe when on a mission. My momma wore it. I wore it.” She sniffed and rubbed her nose, “If you want to join...if you really do, we support you. Your mom and me. We love you, Hen. So damn much. You’ll wear that when you go to Fort Salem. It’ll keep you safe when we can’t.”

“Did you wear it when you got hurt?”

A flicker at the corner of her mouth, “I gave it to a little boy to wear. He was scared, and I promised to keep him safe till we got him back to Base.”

Henley cradled it in her palm, “Do you hate me?”

“Never, Hen.” Raelle held up her arm, and Henley fell into her side, “We could never ever hate you. We want you to be happy. If this is what makes you happy, then we’re happy, too.”

“Mom?”

“She loves you.”

“She’s mad.”

“Fucking furious.”

Henley giggled wetly.

Raelle nudged her, “Doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you. She’s scared. We both are. You...this wasn’t something we saw coming.”

“Is this why you hide your uniforms?”

“I don’t hide them. I don’t have a reason to wear them.” another sigh, “We never hid this from you. You know we served. You’ve seen my scourge. We just...there are things that are really hard to talk about. It’s complicated and painful. Bad memories.”

“All of them?”

“No, not all. I did meet your mom at Fort Salem.”

Henley snuggled into her momma’s side, “I want to do this.”

“I know.”

Feeling a presence behind them, Henley heard her momma call softly, “You want in on this group hug, Scyl, or is this too much Collar for you to handle?”

Henley felt her mom walk up to them and lower herself on the other side of the younger witch. “Ramshorn-Collar.”

Peeking over at her mom and seeing her face flutter with emotion and eyes shimmer with fondness, Henley pushed off her momma and rocked into Scylla’s arms. She cried as those loving arms wrapped around her and squeezed. Raelle’s hand landed on her back, touch comforting.

“I love you, Henley.” Scylla promised. She kissed the top of her head, “No matter what, I will always choose you.”

“Love you, Mom.”

Raelle rubbed at her eyes with her free hand and muttered, “Glory’s hand brewed bullshit is not strong enough for this.”

Scylla almost cracked a smile at her wife’s attempt to lighten the mood. She rested her chin on top of Henley’s head as the girl burrowed into her chest. She glanced at Raelle, catching her gaze. There was so much they needed to discuss. To worry about. To work through.

But now was not the time.

Later, when the lights were off and Henley was asleep, they’d talk. 

For now, they huddled around their daughter and offered her what they always promised to - love and warmth and protection. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raelle slowly walked over, sitting down beside her. Shoulder to shoulder, they stared out the window. 
> 
> Warm and safe, her wife’s presence called to her, offering whatever she needed, slouched shoulders and stiff muscles inviting her to be there with her.
> 
> Biting hard enough to taste copper, Scylla let her head drop, face nestling in the crook of Raelle’s neck. She sucked in a haggard breath as Raelle cupped the back of her head, lips brushing against her hair.
> 
> “She’s asleep.” Raelle whispered, words as soft as a feather.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This monster took on a life of its own. My gosh, it just wouldn't stop, you guys. Don't judge your sleep deprived author, please. Also, rating changed from the first chapter. Be aware.

Scylla stared down out the window, the quiet of the house too loud and not loud enough to drown out the thoughts slicing through her mind like white hot knives, twisted and cursed like a Camarilla dagger. 

_“Mom. Momma.” Henley pulled her shoulders back and puffed her chest out. She dug her hand in her jacket’s inside pocket and plucked out a medallion, tossing the chain over her head dramatically and letting the pendant rest against her chest proudly, “I enlisted in Fort Salem’s upcoming first year cadet class. I took the oath.”_

_Raelle slid out of her seat, kneeling before her, “Tally and Abigail will fight over who is the best aunt. Anacostia will get more grey hairs. Byron will try to make us name her some dumb Shakespeare name. I’ll get her drunk on moonshine when she’s old enough, and you’ll yell at me.” She brought Scylla’s hand to her mouth and kissed the back reverently, “You will be the best mom any kid has ever had, and I’ll love you both forever. You would be so amazing, Scyl. I know it. You’re smart and kind and you’d protect her no matter what. You’ll teach her all about how beautiful life and death and the world are. How there is so much more than what we see. She’ll be top of her class, just like her mom. I’ll teach her how to dance and find her way home no matter where she is. We’ll make sure she knows she is loved, always. We’ll protect her. Take care of her.”_

_“No, but I gotta keep up my cool supportive mama front while I sabotage it. Come on, Scyl, you’re supposed to be the sneaky one. We let them think they’re doing whatever they want, but they’re actually doing everything according to our wonderfully thought out and implemented plan.”_

_Anacostia looked tired. Her normally perfect posture was gone, replaced by an exhausted slouch. She couldn’t hide the agony in the corner of her gaze. Couldn’t defend the wrinkles in her clothing or the dip of her chin. “She was brave.” A small sad smile, “Like we all knew she was. So god damn brave.”_

_“Raelle is dead.”_

Her chin quivered, and she locked her jaw to fight back the desperate grief swirling in her chest like an unstoppable hurricane, growing with each breath, each thought, each moment. 

How could this have happened?

Why was this happening?

Her eyes flickered back and forth, not seeing the well kept yard slightly visible through the window, the small mushroom garden off to the side, the same garden she spent hours in with Henley, showing her different varieties, different species, and explaining what they did. How they could be used. What they meant for their kind. Instead she sifting and searching through every single second she had with her daughter.

Her hands tightened into fists, tendons protesting at the grip. 

What had she missed? 

Her daughter thought she wanted her to join the Army.

Join the organization that did its best to take everything away from her. 

That stole her parents. Stole her childhood. Stole her hopes and dreams for so long.

Until she met Raelle.

It tried to steal her, too.

Now, it was back, trying to take her child. 

Henley, sweet goofy brilliant Henley.

Who marveled at every bit of Work Scylla showed her. Listened intently as Scylla explained about balance, about cycles, how everything was interconnected. Life becomes death which becomes life again. Who gushed about her girlfriend and to every single member of their friends and family group, earning her parents, Raelle, a sideways smirk everytime Henley opened her mouth to recite some story about green eyes and a pretty smile.

Henley.

Who chose to join.

Chose to put herself in danger.

Because she thought that was what Scylla wanted. What her parents wanted. What would make them happy.

Goddess.

Henley thought she wanted this.

Soft footfalls echoed like a windstrike in the silence behind her. The bedroom door shut with an almost inaudible click that boomed like an explosion in Scylla’s ears. Her teeth sank into her bottom lip, and her fists dug into the comforter. 

Raelle slowly walked over, sitting down beside her. Shoulder to shoulder, they stared out the window. 

Warm and safe, her wife’s presence called to her, offering whatever she needed, slouched shoulders and stiff muscles inviting her to be there with her.

Biting hard enough to taste copper, Scylla let her head drop, face nestling in the crook of Raelle’s neck. She sucked in a haggard breath as Raelle cupped the back of her head, lips brushing against her hair.

“She’s asleep.” Raelle whispered, words as soft as a feather.

Scylla nodded, jaw working as she pushed back the darkness threatening to consume her. The same darkness she hadn’t felt for years. Not since before she married Raelle. Not since their fight when Raelle stayed in the military. Not since the War. Since standing in the back, listening as Anacostia told a group of people who never really knew Raelle how brave the young soldier was, had been. Since Raelle walked away from her in the basement.

Since they both had chains, visible and invisible, latched onto their wrists, unbreakable and scorching. 

“I love you.” Raelle’s voice cracked.

Scylla pressed a kiss to the side of her throat. She unfurled a fist, blindly setting her palm on Raelle’s thigh, their hands instantly linking together. A rush of need curled deep inside her belly. Everything was slipping through her fingers, like sand being pulled away by the tide, drifting out to sea, unable to stop, unable to do anything but swirl and succumb to the whims of a power so strong and outside her control. 

Griping Raelle’s hand tight enough to cause her knuckles to whiten to the color of marble, Scylla swung a leg over Raelle’s hips, lowering herself onto her lap. Her mouth trailed up the blonde’s throat, passing over her jaw and landing at the corner of her mouth.

Raelle’s hands steadied her, familiar anchors at her waist. “Scyl,” she murmured, the name breathing into the mouth slanting over her own. Her eyes closed as an insistent demanding tongue sought entrance, sought to taste and feel and forget.

To quiet her mind and calm her soul.

Raelle returned the wet embrace fingers digging into Scylla’s sides as the brunette tangled her fingers in her hair, pulling her closer. Teeth nipped and lips suckled, desperately consuming everything there was to offer and needing more. Needing so much more. 

Words and thoughts and feelings tumbling through her mind, never stopping, never giving mercy, Scylla rose to her knees. She roughly guided Raelle’s hand to the front of her jeans. 

“Scyl,” Raelle broke their kiss, panting as her fingers hit denim.

Scylla rocked into the touch, “Fuck me, Rae.”

Raelle blinked, staring into her eyes, eyes stinging with all the emotions Scylla was forced to hold back, forced to keep at bay because her daughter needed her mom.

Because she had to be strong.

With a short nod, she surged up, Scylla’s arms winding around her shoulders and ankles hooking at the small of her back as they stumbled, Raelle spinning and laying Scylla back on the bed. Her hands hastily went to the button and zipper of her wife’s jeans, undoing and lowering until Scylla could lift her hips and schuck the denim and cotton down to her knees. 

Scylla gasped as Raelle hovered over her, fingers roughly pulling at her shirt as a hot mouth latched on to her throat. She keened when a tongue licked at her pulse, teeth biting down hard enough to bruise. Arms lifting, her shirt was all but torn over her head, eager hands grabbing for strong shoulders the moment they were free. 

Raelle cupped her center, calloused palm harsh against delicate flesh. 

Helplessness biting at her mind the same way Raelle bit at her neck, Scylla rolled them over, forcing Raelle onto her back. She sat up, fully removing the knitted cotton and denim restraining her, and kneeled over her wife. Raelle stared up at her, eyes half hooded as Scylla guided her hand to her mouth. Holding her gaze, she sucked on each finger, rolling her tongue around her knuckles and nibbling at each crease, each tip. Raelle’s chest heaved, hips canting up to push against damp desire.

Never breaking eye contact, never breaking the unspoken link between them, Scylla lowered Raelle’s hand to between her thighs.

Raelle touched her, and Scylla inhaled sharply, her back tensing at the sensation.

Raelle sat up, wrapping a supportive arm around her back as she traced the length of her slit, exploring already memorized softness.

“Please,” Scylla whispered, needing her mind to disappear, needing a release from the fear and hopelessness.

Her head fell back as a finger carefully circled her entrance before slowly entering her.

She rocked her hips, head dropping forward as lips kissed the valley between her breasts, worshipping every inch of skin they came into contact with. Hot. Wet. Reverent. She met each thrust, rolling her hips and clinging to her lover as another spit slicked finger slid into her heat, a rough thumb rubbing small tight circles against her clit.

They moved together, up and down, like two ships passing in the night across the sea, searching for a light in the darkness, a path in the stars, a measure of hope in the waves.

When Scylla came with a quiet shudder, she kissed her wife, their tears mingling together. 

“Rae,” Scylla wept, face pressed against Raelle’s.

She didn’t even know she was crying until she felt Raelle kiss one away.

“We’re ok. We’re ok.” Raelle chanted, unsure if it was meant for Scylla or herself. “You’re so beautiful. So damn beautiful. I’m here. Right here.”

“We said we’d protect her.”

“”I know. I know. We will. Promise.” 

They sat there, holding onto each other. Holding on to safety. Something tangible and real and solid.

Breath evening out, Scylla cradled her close, “Do you remember when we brought her home?”

Raelle chuckled sadly, “She wouldn’t stop cryin’ till you took her outside to your damn mushroom garden.”

“She hates mushrooms.”

“She hated that Army onesie Abigail got her.”

“She did.” 

“I’ll fix this, Scylla.”

“How? What is there to fix?” A scoff, “This is all my fault.”

“No,” Raelle tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, “No, it’s not, baby.”

“If I had told her…”

“We agreed not to.”

“I lied to her, Raelle. Just like I lied to you. I lost you and…”

“You _never_ lost me.” Raelle bit out forcefully. “You could never lose me. Not really.”

“I did. You left. You got hurt.” Scylla’s throat bobbed, “If I told her what happened, if I didn’t lie about my past, we wouldn’t be here.”

“ _We both_ agreed to not talk about it.” Raelle cupped her cheek. “You never lied.”

“She thinks I want her to join the Army, Raelle.” Scylla bit out. She pulled her head back, eyes snapping open completely, “The one thing I never wanted.”

“I know. She’s...confused.”

“She’s not confused, Raelle. She doesn’t know. Because I lied.”

“ _This isn’t your fault_.”

“I should have known better. Whenever I lie…”

“ _I lied, too_.” Raelle cut her off. “I lied, too, Scyl. Because there was no reason our daughter needed to know.”

“Raelle,”

“What? Do you want to tell her?” Raelle leaned back, “Tell her that the Army used to force witches to serve? If we didn’t, they hunted us down and killed us?”

“They killed my parents, Raelle.” Scylla spoke lowly, words bitter.

Raelle’s brows dipped with sympathy, with understanding.

Scylla continued, “They killed them, and they didn’t care. We enlisted, and they didn’t care.” As Raelle opened her mouth, she shook her head, “I know. It’s different now. But,” she paused, swallowing back more tears, “I look at her, and all I can think is how young and beautiful and full of life she is, and the Army will kill that. Whether it’s by training or something else.”

“I’ll get her out of it. I’ll call Abi first thing. Visit the recruiter.”

“She took the oath, Rae. She has her medal.”

“Then she’ll untake it.” Raelle stubbornly spat out. “If they really need someone that badly, I’ll go back.”

“The hell you will.” Scylla’s eyes flared, “You gave enough, Raelle. More than enough.” She shook her head, “You gave so much you have nightmares. We both do. You...Rae, you couldn’t even be an option when it came to Henley.”

_The Fixer, a colonel Raelle remembered being around long before Raelle took over the division and helped to reshape it, held the folder, not looking up from the reports inside, “Captain Collar.”_

_“Ramshorn-Collar.” Raelle corrected. She knew it said that._

_Just like she knew the colonel hadn’t looked at her wife since they walked in._

_Scylla squeezed her hand._

_“Right, well, we ran some tests. There should be no trouble with your wife getting pregnant. If you perform the right seeds, right time of the month, of the year, stay healthy, I see no issue with your attempts at having a child.”_

_“What about Raelle?” Scylla leaned into her shoulder. They hadn’t completely decided who would carry, still going back and forth over who was the better option to make midnight ice cream runs and become a master foot massager. It was almost a game now. Who could be the better caregiver._

_“Not an option.” the folder snapped shut, “Based on the level of trauma your body sustained during the War, your injury from your first mission, and the unknown effects of the mycelium, I highly recommend against it.”_

_The couple blinked, “What?”_

_“Captain, I am almost certain you can never carry a child to term. Your body simply cannot handle it.”_

Raelle offered her a wobbly grin, “You pregnant was the most gorgeous sight I’ve ever seen. And, I made friends with the night clerk at the ice cream shop. They still give us free scoops when Henley comes in. Double dark chocolate for you.”

Scylla didn’t respond.

Raelle nudged her, “I love you. I love our daughter. You want us to run? We’ll go. Right now. Make a break for the Cession and keep heading west.”

“You said we don’t have to run anymore.” Scylla reminded her.

_“We’re not our parents, Scyl.” Raelle continued. “I’m not going to leave you or our kid. Ever. I’m not going to abandon you.” She was on the edge of her seat, hand reaching out for Scylla’s, “We don’t have to run to keep our kids safe. We don’t have to hide.”_

“I also told you our kid would be a Fixer, but she can’t even put a bandaid on right.” Raelle spoke firmly yet softly, “I would do anything for you and her. I am never walking away from either of you. I never should have when I did. I never should have left you in that basement. I never should have left when you wanted me to get a discharge. I...this is our family. _Ours_. I’ll follow your lead, Scyl. I always have. I’ll be a dodger. I’ll re-enlist. I’ll be Spree.”

“You would never be Spree.” Scylla frowned, “Don’t talk like that.” A murmur, “They don’t even exist anymore. Not like that.”

“Will it keep you and Henley safe?” 

“Raelle,”

“Anything, Scyl. Anything. It’ll be ok.” Raelle whispered, voice eager, almost begging, “I can pull some strings. She’ll never see combat. Be assigned to someone’s staff.”

“Raelle.” 

“I can do this. I can keep her safe. Just like I promised.” Raelle vowed.

“Our daughter would never agree to that.” Scylla murmured in resignation.

“I don’t care.” Raelle sniffed. “She’ll never know.”

“Yes, she will.” Her lips quirked, “You have never been subtle.”

“Fine, then she knows.What is she going to do?”

Scylla’s eyes fluttered closed, her mouth twisting with grief.

“Scyl?”

Scylla’s jaw locked.

“Scyl, hey.” Raelle swallowed thickly, “You and me, right? We can figure it out. We can do this. Hell….I can go tomorrow. Get this all sorted out.” 

Scylla remained quiet, jaw working as she pushed back the darkness threatening to consume her. The same darkness she hadn’t felt for years. Not since before she married Raelle. Not since their fight when Raelle stayed in the military. Not since the War. Since standing in the back, listening as Anacostia told a group of people who never really knew Raelle how brave the young soldier was, had been. Since Raelle walked away from her in the basement.

Since they both had chains, visible and invisible, latched onto their wrists, unbreakable and scorching. 

“I love you.” Raelle’s voice cracked. “It’ll be ok.”

“Yeah.”

Raelle kissed her cheek, “Trust me. Be brave with me.”

Scylla nodded.

“Tell me what you need.”

“You here. With me.”

“Always.”

* * *

Henley tossed and turned in her bed, the sheets tangling in her legs like cotton chains, twisting around and holding her down. With a vicious kick, she fought against them, grunting in frustration when their vice like grip only tightened. 

“Damn it.” she muttered darkly. With a huff of angry annoyance, she bent over and ripped at the sheets, nearly tearing them as she roughly pulled them back and threw them to the far edge of the bed.

A glance at the clock on her bedside table, balanced precariously on top of a book about Necromancy in the early fifteen hundreds, searched for the time. It was next to a photo of her and Alisson standing next to each other, Alisson gleefully displaying her medal with War College etched on the side as her fellow graduates milled behind the couple, Henley’s arm draped happily across her shoulders.

The photo that always brought a smile to her face made her stomach churn like she was going to be sick.

Instead she focused her gaze on the clock.

It was late. Well past midnight. The moon would be high in the starlit sky, the neighborhood quiet, peaceful, so unlike her mind. 

It was like a never-ending film, playing over and over on repeat, a horror anthology that had no conclusion. The torture just kept going.

_“I went to your funeral, Raelle.” Scylla’s voice was quiet but deathly somber, “I stood there and watched them talk about you in front of an empty casket. I had to hear about you dying. I had to listen as Anacostia told me you were never coming back. Do not tell me she’ll be ok. You were supposed to graduate and go to War College, but you were sent out that same day to be left for dead.” Her words dropped to a shattered whisper, “She’s so much like you, Raelle.”_

Her mom looked so broken. Her voice...Henley had never heard her sound like that before. Even the memory of it made her chest clench painfully, like someone had shoved their hand straight through,past flesh and bone, to grip her heart and squeeze with so much strength it was a wonder she could even breathe.

Her momma had died. 

Her momma, who made all her aches and pains, however small, feel better, who listened as she talked about Alisson, who was always there, had...been gone. 

No one told her.

No one told her anything. 

What else had they kept from her?

She inhaled sharply.

_“Scylla...your mom...never liked the Army. She has her reasons. A lot of them. What they did to her parents. To her. To all of us.”_

What had she meant? What had happened to her mom?

Henley swung her legs over the side of the bed.

She couldn’t sleep.

Not with everything that had happened.

The urge to call Alisson sprung up, but she quickly quashed it. Her girlfriend was at War College. She would be sleeping. The entire campus would be asleep. Even if someone answered the phone, she had training in a few hours. Henley didn’t want to mess anything up for her. She was doing well in her blaster courses. 

Biting her lip, she wrung her hands. 

Unconsciously, her eyes ticked back to the table. Over the clock and around the photo frame to the combat charm she dropped there as she tried to pretend like she could get some sleep that night.

Her momma’s combat charm.

Did her mom have one?

Where was it?

What was it?

Had she worn it during the War? Did it have anything to do with whatever happened to her? Why she didn’t like the Army?

How long had her mom not liked the Army? How couldn’t she? Their entire family served!

Why was everything so messed up?

She stared at the blue gem in the claw. 

A wave of pain struck her soul.

Her parents were so upset.

They cried.

Both of them.

She made her parents cry.

Guilt gnawed at her conscious, and she abruptly stood up. She couldn’t stay there. Couldn’t sit around. She needed to move. Energy coursed through her. Hot and wild. She felt like she could run a marathon. Run all the way to Fort Salem. 

The very thought of leaving her parents behind nearly knocked her to her knees. 

Suddenly, she felt like she was five years old and had a nightmare. A big scary one about evil monsters that wanted to hurt her. Hurt her family. Her mom and momma would come in and tell her funny stories and hug her until she knew nothing would ever hurt her. Her momma would thoroughly check under the bed and secure the perimeter while her mom made a show of humming protection seeds. 

They kept her safe.

The sudden urge to go downstairs and find her momma’s moonshine slammed into her, making her throat feel parched and her teeth ache.

She wanted to have a drink, or twenty, and not think about how her entire life, her family, stopped making sense. How questions attacked her. Mercilessly tore at the very fabric of her understanding. Her parents, her heroes...who were they? Who was she? 

Why did nothing make sense?

Rising to her feet, the need to see them held her tight. She crept toward the door, slowly opening it so it wouldn’t make a sound. Holding her breath, she tiptoed down the hall and to the partially open door leading to her parents’ bedroom. 

She just wanted to make sure they were ok. 

She just wanted to see them.

She just wanted her parents.

She wanted to pretend she was little again, and have them wrap her up in their arms and tell her this was all a bad dream. 

That they loved her. Were proud of her. That they could have chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast, with all three of them helping, each mixing and pouring and flipping and teasing as they talked about what they all could do together that day. Do something together because their days together were waning since Henley was an adult and soon leaving home to lead her own life.

She was an adult.

And her parents were acting like she was a child.

Anger, frustration, guilt, confusion, sadness, regret - it all bubbled inside like some horrible stew. Mixing and simmering. Waiting to be served.

Crouching, she poked her head around the doorframe of the half opened door.

It was empty.

Her eyes widened.

Where were they?

Had they left?

Where would they go?

They wouldn’t leave without telling her, right?

“Your momma is in the shower.”

Henley spun around, coming face to face with her mom. “Mom?” 

Scylla looked exhausted. She looked smaller than Henley could ever remember her being, even when she stood next to Aunt Abigail who towered over both her parents. Her pajamas seemed to hang loose on her, her glasses unable to hide the wrinkles around her eyes, mug almost too large for her hands. 

Coming out of her thoughts, Henley did hear the water running through the pipes and the sound of the shower spray behind the nearby closed door.

“You should be in bed, Hen.” Scylla cradled the mug.

“Couldn’t sleep.”

Scylla nodded, “Tea?”

Like all the other times she couldn’t sleep, anxious thoughts or adolescent fears keeping her awake. Scylla would make her tea and stay with her until she could fall asleep again, sometimes Raelle joined them, but usually it was only the two of them. 

Henley found herself nodding.

Scylla offered her a small smile and turned around, heading back down the stairs. Henley followed, each step making her anxiety increase as the emotions continued to battle for dominance in her gut.

Scylla flicked the kitchen light on, setting her mug down and going for the cupboard, pulling down the container Henley had made as a school project when she was really little. She plucked out a bag and moved to the stove, refilling the kettle and putting it on to heat up.

They were both silent as the water warmed.

Henley watched her. The precise movements honed from years puttering around this kitchen. The way she could keep her emotions off her face, though Raelle always seemed to be able to tell what she was feeling. A face that looked so much like her own. Henley always felt a sense of joy when people said she was a perfect melding of her parents. They were her heroes. The two people she could always count on, no matter what.

They seemed larger than life. No matter how bad things got, they could withstand it. Conquer it. 

For half a second, Henley wanted to go back in time. Hop into her parents’ bed and snuggle between them, letting their comforting presence wash over her and envelope her in a cocoon nothing bad or sad or scary could penetrate.

The other half of that second, she felt her temper flare up. They had lied to her for years. Her entire life. They always preached about not lying, about trusting each other, being there for each other, yet they never told her anything. Kept her in the dark. 

When a slight squeak began to sound, Scylla turned the heat off, dropping the bag in a mug and pouring the steaming water over it. Without a word, she turned and walked to the table, setting it on the wooden surface.

“Mom?” Henley shuffled on her feet, hands moving to jam into non existent pockets.

Scylla’s shoulders rose and fell as she took a breath.

“Why did you lie to me?” Henley let the words tumble out, internally wincing as her mother flinched, but not stopping, “We don’t lie. Momma said she died but...it doesn’t make any sense. And, I know there’s a lot you’re not telling me. I can handle it. I don’t get why you don’t trust me. I’m not a little kid, anymore. None of this makes sense. I just want to understand.”

Scylla took a moment, composing herself, “I love you.” Her eyes shone in the fluorescent light, lost in thought, in memories, “You and your momma are the best thing to ever happen to me. Sometimes, I wonder if this is even real. The second they put you in my arms for the first time...I can’t tell you how I felt. Having you, marrying your momma...I never thought I could have this. Anything like this.”

Henley’s fingers tangled together, “Why?”

Scylla steeled herself, “I was a Dodger.”

Henley frowned, not understanding, “What?”

“My parents didn’t believe in conscription. They...they were kind. Nice. Happy. Peaceful. They didn’t believe in fighting unless there was no other choice. They refused to serve in an army that forced witches to spend their lives fighting wars they had no say in. They wanted to live their lives how they wanted. They wanted me to live my life how I wanted.”

Conscription. She remembered learning about it briefly in school, maybe a paragraph or two in a history textbook, and it was sometimes mentioned when her Aunts talked, but not much, and they usually stopped whenever she was around. 

It used to exist, but not anymore. Witches used to be drafted into mandatory service. 

But that was forever ago.

“The army killed my parents.”

Henley froze. 

Scylla reached for her own mug, picking it up but quickly setting it back down, “Dodgers were seen as traitors. Cowards. The army made an example of any they caught. We always moved around, never stayed in any one place for long, but they still caught us.”

Henley frowned, battling to comprehend what she was learning, her heart aching for her mom, yet her mind still not understanding, “But...you still served.”

“I wanted justice. I never wanted anyone else to go through what I did. I wanted liberation. Freedom.”

“Mom?”

“I took the oath, Henley, but I was never military. I was Spree.”

Henley blinked, head shaking, “I don’t...understand.”

Spree. It sounded so familiar. Tasted funny, like acid, on her tongue. 

“The Spree fought to liberate witches. To end conscription. To...protect us from those who wanted to hurt us. We fought for freedom.” Scylla pursed her lips, “I was an operative.”

“You were a spy?”

“Something like that.”

Henley sat down.

A spy? Her mom? It didn’t make any sense. She served. She took the oath. She knew she did. 

“I fought so that we weren’t slaves anymore. We could live our lives how we wanted, just like my parents.”

“Momma…she...I’ve seen her uniforms. She wore her uniform at your wedding. How…she was army. For years. ”

“I fell in love.” Scylla caught her eye and didn’t look away, “I love your momma more than anything except you. I met her, and I loved her.” She took a breath, “I was supposed to bring her in. The Spree wanted her. I was sent to recruit her.”

“What? Why? Why did they want Momma?”

Because she was a suicidal daughter of one of the cell leaders was not something Scylla wanted to get into at that moment, if ever. It wasn’t important, and Raelle’s relationship with Willa was still rocky after all these years. If Raelle was willing to talk about it with Henley, they could cross that bridge when they got to it. 

“They just did. They knew she was powerful and could be important.”

“Why didn’t you recruit her? You didn’t, right? She wasn’t Spree or whatever?”

“Oh, I tried. For about five minutes.” Scylla chuckled, “Your momma could charm me without even trying...and she was trying. I love your momma. I will always love her. She was never Spree. You should talk with her, about her feelings for the Army. Your momma has never been a blind follower. The military isn’t black or white. Nothing is.”

Henley slouched in her chair, overwhelmed, when another thought popped in her head, “You said Momma died.”

Scylla tensed, body visibly straining as her voice turned hoarse, “We thought she did. She...her first mission went bad. The army left her and your Aunt Abigail behind.” Her voice cut off, and she had to clear her throat, “Raelle was stabbed. Through the heart. Camarilla. It was the start of the War. Your Aunt tried to save her. The….general at the time left them behind to save herself.”

A surge of blind rage roared in Henley’s veins, “ _They left her_?”

Scylla nodded.

“How...how is she even here?”

“Your mom found us.” Raelle’s voice piped in.

Henley looked over to see her momma, freshly scrubbed, hair sticking up as she ran a hand through the damp strands, trying to tame them, clad in a pair of worn pajama pants and old faded t-shirt. Raelle walked in ruffling Henley’s hair before reaching Scylla, pressing a kiss to her cheek and resting a hand on her lower back. 

“Mom found you?”

Raelle nodded, ducking down to a lower cabinet. She popped back up with a bottle, half full, the label long gone, if it was ever there at all.

“Rae,” Scylla scolded.

“I am too sober for this conversation.”

“Raelle.”

Raelle popped off the cap and poured a healthy measure into Scylla’s tea. Only Scylla could see how her hand shook and features flickered, eyes troubled.

“Why didn’t you tell me any of this?”

“It wasn’t important.”

“No, you two don’t get to do this.” Henley crossed her arms defiantly. “You two freak out, then act like it’s ok, and now you’ve been hiding a lot of stuff and probably talking about this stuff with everyone else that you never told me about, but you clearly should have, because it affects me. It affects our family.” She glared, hot anger mixing with sadness, causing her blue eyes to flash, “It affects _us_.”

The Collar temper appeared.

“I trusted you both, and you lied to me. You lied about everything. What’s even real?”

Scylla swayed back as if struck.

_Was any of it real?_

“Henley!” Raelle’s voice rose, “Tone it down, right now. We’re your parents. We tell you what you need to know when you need to know it.”

“I don’t understand! I’m confused, and you’re telling me stuff, but it doesn’t make sense!”

Raelle opened her mouth, but Scylla touched her arm.

Two Collars getting emotional late at night was not going to solve anything.

Henley got her hot temper from one side of the family, and it wasn’t Scylla’s.

“I’ll tell you whatever you want to know, Hen.” Scylla spoke, “But, a lot of it is hard. I understand you’re confused. But, it’s not easy for me or your momma. A lot of it still hurts.”

Henley deflated, “Momma said that earlier.”

“Your momma was right.”

“Mom,”

“We have plenty of time to talk about everything. We will. I promise.” 

Scylla never broke a promise to Henley.

Promises were important. You never break a promise to someone you care about.

Scylla walked over to her, crouching down and grasping her hands, “You’re scared. We are, too. I’m so scared, Henley. But, you’re brave. You’re our daughter, and you can do anything. You can handle anything.”

Guilt crashed into her as she stared into eyes so full of fear yet awash with love. This was her mom. She was hurting her mom. Both of them. “I’m sorry,” she sniffed, “I’m so sorry, Mom”

“Shhh,” Scylla hugged her.

“I didn’t know. I didn’t know!”

“I know, honey.” Scylla cupped her face, rubbing away the tears, “Your momma and I love you. I love you. Do you want to join the Army? Don’t worry about us or anyone else. Just you. Do you want this?”

Henley thought about it. About the dark blue uniform she’d sneak into her parents’ room without them knowing and stare at, sometimes trying to put on the matching boots and march around the bedroom. She thought of Alisson, green eyes bright as she showed Henley her barracks and introduced her to her Unit. She thought of the Necro building she snuck into at Fort Salem, the way it seemed so cool, so welcoming. She thought of her Aunt Tally and Aunt Abigail, the way they were with her momma. Unit Unity. The way her Aunt Glory laughed about some prank their building played when her momma was sprinting back for inspection once. Aunt Anacostia and her regal demeanor but affectionate smile. The medals that were in a box in her parent’s closet.

“Yes.”

Scylla nodded, “It will be hard. The Army isn’t a game.”

“I know.”

Scylla exhaled, “You’re an adult. No matter how much your momma and I wish you weren’t.”

“I love you, Mom.”

“I love you, too, Henley.” She rose to her feet, kissing her daughter’s forehead. “Now, get up.”

Henley shot her a look, “What?”

Scylla turned and ambled over to her wife who had been silently watching, playing with the bottle in her hand, “You’ll need to get into War College on your own merit. That means being prepared. Being well trained.” She poked at Raelle’s bicep, “Your momma could use some training too.”

Raelle’s face said it all.

Henley stood up, “Training?”

Raelle set the bottle down and clapped her hands together, “Let’s go, Private. You have five minutes to meet me out front. Shoes on, laces tied, ready to go.”

“Go...where?”

“Did I say you could ask questions, Private?” Raelle barked. “Let’s go. Four minutes, forty-five seconds.”

Seeing how serious her mother was, Henley tripped over her feet as she rushed out of the room.

“Scyl?” Raelle watched her daughter nearly crash into a wall.

“I don’t like this, but if she’s going to do this, I’m going to support her. Always.” Scylla patted her arm, “Please, help her be ready.”

Help her be safe.

Thank the goddess Necros rarely saw combat.

And, even though they playfully bickered, they both knew where her specialization lied.

“We can talk again later. Ok? I’ll bring the drinks.” Raelle nodded, “I ever tell you how amazing my wife is?”

Scylla picked up her tea, “Morning pushups, baby.”

“Yes, ma’am.” She kissed her temple, “Wanna get drunk and mess around after Henley passes out from exhaustion.”

“You mean figure out how Henley is going to survive Basic? How we are going to survive Henley being at Basic?”

“That too.”

Scylla rolled her eyes. 

“You callin’ Book Club? I’m sure your meetings include all of this.”

“She’s already called twice.”

A crash from the second floor echoed down the stairs.

“Goddess,” Raelle sighed, “Let’s go, Henley!” she moved to leave the room. “I swear, Scyl, our kid is a damn mess.”

“Wait till she does the sprint of shame when she gets to Fort Salem.”

“Damn it.” She looked back at her wife, “We’ll figure it out, right?”

Scylla nodded, “We’ll figure it out.”

Raelle’s eyes softened, “Prettiest gal in town.”

“Wait till you meet your wife.”

“Think she’ll say yes if I ask her to dance?”

“There’s always a chance.”

“That’s all I ever asked for.” Raelle winked.

CRASH

“Henley! Goddess, did she get clumsier when she took the oath?”

Scylla watched her go, fingertips coming up to rub at her forehead. 

_“We’ve always said we can figure it out together. We can figure this out, too. How...how to care for someone else. You’ll read books, and I’ll freak out during the classes. I’ll pretend like I know what’s happening because I’m a fixer, but I’ll be too in love with both of you to see straight.”_

_Scylla huffed out a wet laugh._

_Raelle slid out of her seat, kneeling before her, “Tally and Abigail will fight over who is the best aunt. Anacostia will get more grey hairs. Byron will try to make us name her some dumb Shakespeare name. I’ll get her drunk on moonshine when she’s old enough, and you’ll yell at me.” She brought Scylla’s hand to her mouth and kissed the back reverently, “You will be the best mom any kid has ever had, and I’ll love you both forever. You would be so amazing, Scyl. I know it. You’re smart and kind and you’d protect her no matter what. You’ll teach her all about how beautiful life and death and the world are. How there is so much more than what we see. She’ll be top of her class, just like her mom. I’ll teach her how to dance and find her way home no matter where she is. We’ll make sure she knows she is loved, always. We’ll protect her. Take care of her.”_

_Scylla sniffled, free hand swiping at her eyes._

_Raelle held her hand tightly, “A baby, Scyl. With your eyes and smile. Can you imagine?”_


End file.
